Tag Archive for ‘jokes’
Can You Bear It?
Can you Bear It? An American called Bill decided to write a book about famous churches around the world, so he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to Orlando, thinking that he would start by working his way across the USA from South to North. On his first day he was inside a […]
Can You Bear It?
An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one-question final exam after a semester dealing with a broad array of topics. The class was already seated and ready to go when the professor picked up his chair, plonked it on his desk, and wrote on the board: ‘Using everything we have learned this semester, prove that this […]
Can You Bear It?
Can you Bear It? A travel agent sees an old lady and gent peering in the shop window looking at the glamorous destinations. The agent had a very good week in sales and was having a rare feeling of generosity. He called the couple into his shop. ‘I know you’re pensioners and could never hope […]
Can You Bear It?
A fleeing member of the Taliban, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghan desert when he saw something far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he hurried toward the mirage, only to find a little old Jewish man at a small stand, selling ties. The Taliban man asked, “Do you have water?” […]
Can You Bear It?
THE CHURCH CHAIN OF COMMAND The Parist Priest He is faster than a speeding bullet, stronger than a locomotive, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound, can walk on water and talks to God. The Assistant Priest He is almost as fast as a speeding bullet, is stronger than a traction engine, able […]
Can You Bear It?
Can you Bear It? “Do you love me with all your heart and soul?” asked Becky on Valentines Day. “Mmm hmm,” replied Dave. “Do you think I’m the most beautiful girl in the world?” “Mmm hmm.” “Do you think my lips are like rose petals?” “Mmm hmm.” “Oh Dave,” gushed Becky, “you say the most […]
Can You Bear It? – Jokes for the family
A Scottish woman goes to the local newspaper office to see that the obituary for her recently deceased husband is published. The obit editor informs her that there is a charge of 50p per word. She pauses, reflects, and then she says, “Well, then, let it read, ‘Angus McPherson died’.” Amused at the woman’s thrift, […]
Can you Bear It?
Lovely Service Vicar A preacher was being very long-winded while a grandfather and child were becoming restless. The boy spotted the red light in the sanctuary, and eagerly asked his grandfather ,“When that light turns to green, can we go?” Another preacher was being very long-winded when a man got up and started to leave. […]
Can You Bear It?
It’s 2012 and it’s the Olympics in London … A Scotsman, an Englishman and a New Zealander want to get in, but they haven’t got tickets.The Scotsman picks up a manhole cover, tucks it under his arm and walks to the gate. “ McTavish , Scotland,” he says, “Discus” and in he walks. The Englishman […]
Can you bear it?
“Thanks for the harmonica you gave me for my birthday,” little Joshua said to his uncle. “It’s the best present I ever got.” “That’s great,” said his uncle. “Do you know how to play it?” “Oh, I don’t play it,” the little fellow replied. “My mum gives me a dollar a day not to play […]
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